Janet

Jun 21 · Posted

Not making any big claims but I've started writing down how I sleep and how I feel by about 4pm the next day. Just a line or two in my phone notes. Been doing it eight days. Also trying to eat something proper in the evening rather than whatever's easiest to grab. Simple stuff. Nothing dramatic. Early days. But I wanted to log it somewhere so I can look back. Will report in. x

Jun 13 · Replied

Community post

Thank you Patricia, and everyone who replied. This is exactly why I posted. Reading these has made me feel much less ridiculous, and I am adding a few notes before my next appointment.

Jun 13 · Posted

Hi all. I posted here a while back when I was in a really dark patch, couldn't sleep, flushes every couple of hours, felt like I was disappearing into myself. I said I'd come back if things shifted and, well, things have shifted a bit so here I am. I don't want to be one of those posts that makes it sound like everything is fixed and perfect, because it isn't. But I had a week last week where I slept four nights in a row without waking more than once. Four nights. I actually cried on the Thursday morning because I'd forgotten what that felt like. What I've been doing differently, not saying any of this is the reason, just noting it for myself really: I've been keeping a sleep and mood diary. Just a notes app, nothing fancy. It helped me go to my follow-up appointment with something real to show rather than just feeling like I was catastrophising. I've been trying to eat something proper in the evening rather than picking at whatever's easiest. Simple dinners, nothing complicated. I noticed I sleep worse when I skip a proper meal and I don't fully understand why but I've written it down. I'm still on HRT and we've been tweaking things. I won't go into detail because everyone's situation is different and I really don't want to accidentally nudge anyone in a direction that isn't right for them. My GP has been much better since I started bringing notes. There's still stuff that needs attention. Energy isn't back fully. Mood is better but fragile. I've got another appointment next month and I've already started a list of what still needs looking at. I just wanted to say to anyone who's in that really frightening early bit: it felt permanent to me. It doesn't feel permanent now. That's all. x

Jun 11 · Posted

I don't usually post long things but I've been sitting on this for a few weeks and I need to put it somewhere. I was really frightened a few months ago. Not just tired or uncomfortable, actually frightened. The sleep had gone completely, I was having hot flushes every hour through the night, and the mood stuff was so bad I didn't recognise myself. I cried in the supermarket over the bread. I'm not someone who cries in supermarkets. I kept telling myself to get a grip and that made everything worse. My first GP appointment I came away with a leaflet and a suggestion to try mindfulness. I'm not saying mindfulness is useless. I'm saying I hadn't slept properly in four months and I needed more than a leaflet. I went back. Different GP. She actually listened. Things have shifted since then. Not fixed, not perfect, still some bad nights, still some days where the fog is thick. But I slept five hours in a row last Tuesday and I nearly texted everyone I know. I'm writing this because I remember reading posts in here when I was at my worst and thinking, will I ever feel a bit better. So if you're there right now, in that frightened place, I just wanted to say: it can shift. I can't tell you how or when because everyone seems to be different. I'm just noting that it did for me, at least a little. Still got things to sort at my follow-up next month. But I wanted to come back and say something other than a complaint for once x