12 Jun
3am again. Sat here with the lamp on because lying in the dark just makes it worse somehow. Wide awake, heart going a bit, nothing specific to worry about but my brain clearly disagrees. This has been going on for months and I genuinely cannot tell if it's peri or just... life? I'm 46. I have a teenager who doesn't sleep either. I have a job that follows me home. Any one of those things could explain this, couldn't it? But all three at once, every single night? I don't know. I need to see the GP and I keep putting it off because I'm already predicting the conversation. "Are you stressed?" Yes. "Have you tried winding down before bed?" Yes. And then I'll come home with nothing and feel stupid for going. How do you even explain something that sounds so... ordinary? How do you make 3am waking and free-floating anxiety sound like something worth investigating? I've started going out for a walk in the evenings, nothing long, just round the block after dinner, partly because I read it might help and partly because I needed something to do with the restlessness. It's not a cure. But it's better than sitting on my phone getting wound up. Dinner's been whatever I can throw together quickly, I'm not doing anything impressive on four hours sleep. If anyone has managed to explain vague symptoms to a GP without being fobbed off I would genuinely love to know how you framed it x