11 Jun
Okay so I went for a walk yesterday. Like a real one, outside, not just parking lot laps at Target. Maybe 15 minutes. And I didn't feel fixed or energized or whatever the wellness people promise. My knees still ached when I got home and I was tired by 7pm like usual. But something was... less bad? Mood-wise. Hard to explain. I've been trying to figure out if I can actually get back to moving my body without it turning into a whole project with a plan and a tracker and a personality change. I don't want to become a fitness person. I just want to not feel like I'm 80. Also tried two of those beginner strength videos this week. The kind where the woman is annoyingly calm and says things like "honor your body." Rolled my eyes the whole time but I did them both. Arms are sore in a way that feels almost good? My main worry going into my next appointment is the fatigue piece. Like I genuinely don't know if the tiredness is a limit I should work around or something that gets better if I push through it slightly. I don't want to ask in a way that sounds like I'm looking for permission to do nothing, because I'm not. I just need someone to help me understand where the line is. Anyway. Walks help something even when they don't help everything. That's basically my whole update.