7d ago
Hello wise ladies. I've been lurking here for probably three months and I keep composing posts in my head and then not sending them, which feels very on brand for where I am right now. I'm Tracy, 57, somewhere in the south west, and I've been divorced for just over two years. The divorce itself was a long time coming and honestly not the hard part. The hard part has been trying to figure out who I am now, in this body, at this age, when the body keeps doing things I didn't sign up for. I'm postmenopause I think, though I haven't had a proper conversation with my GP about any of this yet which I'm aware is a gap I need to close. I've been writing a list of things to mention. It keeps getting longer. Confidence is on there. Dryness is on there, which I've only just managed to write down without feeling embarrassed about it. Anxiety that sort of creeps in sideways when I'm getting ready to go somewhere. The reason I finally decided to post is that I went on a date last week. First one in about 25 years, which is a sentence I still can't quite believe. It was fine, actually. He was perfectly nice. But I spent the whole evening so far inside my own head about how I looked and whether I seemed old and whether my body would let me down in some unspecified future way that I barely remember the actual conversation. I'm not sure what I'm looking for here. Maybe just to know other women are navigating similar things and haven't completely disappeared into them. I walk a lot, which helps. And I'm trying to notice the small good moments rather than just cataloguing the difficult ones. Anyway. Hello. Thanks for existing x