10 Jun
Walks don't fix anything. I want to be clear about that. My knees still hurt, I'm still exhausted, I still cried on Tuesday for reasons I cannot fully explain. None of that has changed. But. I've done three this week, twenty minutes each, just around the estate, headphones in. And something is fractionally different in my head afterwards. Not better exactly. More like the volume gets turned down a bit. I come back still tired but slightly less like I'm being crushed. I'm 49 and I've spent the last year feeling like my body is doing something to me rather than with me, if that makes any sense. The walks feel like a tiny act of not just giving in. Which sounds dramatic for a stroll but here we are. I've been having a bit of protein when I get back, whatever's easy, Greek yoghurt, a handful of nuts, sometimes just a proper lunch that I'd otherwise skip. Probably coincidence but I've had fewer 3pm crashes this week. I do want to ask my GP at some point what exercise is actually safe given my joints because I don't want to make things worse. I keep putting it off because I feel like she'll think I'm being precious. She won't, probably. I just feel embarrassed about how far I've let things slide. Anyone else find the mood thing with walking is real even when nothing else improves? I want to know I'm not imagining it 😊