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Lori

17 Jun

51 and I've started dreading Thursday afternoons more than anything else in my working life, which is saying something because I once had a line manager who ate tuna pasta at his desk every single day. We have a team catch-up at 3pm and I used to be the one who drove those meetings. Came in with ideas, remembered context from weeks back, could hold a whole project in my head. Now I sit there and the words just... go. Not big words, normal ones. Last week I wanted to say "consecutive" and I ended up saying "the ones that come after each other" like I was explaining it to a child. My colleague very kindly filled in the blank. She thought she was being helpful. I wanted to cry in the car park. I don't know if this is peri or just what happens when you've been running on empty for three years. Probably both? My GP has been fine but I've never actually told her how bad it is at work specifically, I've sort of downplayed it because I felt embarrassed. Going to try and write down some actual examples before my next appointment. Not vague "I forget things sometimes" but proper incidents, dates, what I was trying to do. The 3pm crash is its own problem. I've been experimenting with what I eat at lunch because someone in another thread mentioned protein making a difference to the afternoon. Early days but I've switched from whatever sad desk sandwich I was grabbing to something more substantial and I do think the drop isn't quite as brutal? Could be coincidence. Also trying to protect my sleep a bit more rigidly, phone off earlier, no more doom-scrolling at midnight. Whether any of it is actually helping the fog or just making me feel like I'm doing something, I genuinely can't tell yet. Anyone else had to rebuild their confidence at work because of this? I keep second-guessing everything I say in meetings now and that's almost worse than the actual forgetting. x

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