Janet

41 and genuinely baffled by my own body right now. My periods used to be so predictable I could have set a clock by them. Now I honestly don't know if I'm getting a light one or three days of absolute carnage until it's already happening. Last Tuesday I bled through onto my work chair and I'm 41, not 14, and I could have cried in the toilets. Actually I think I did a bit. I've started keeping a scrappy little diary because I've got a GP appointment in a few weeks and I don't want to just sit there going "it's quite heavy I suppose" and have her nod and send me away with nothing. So I'm writing down when it starts, how heavy (rough scale, nothing fancy), how wiped out I feel the day after, whether I can actually function. The fatigue is the bit I keep underplaying when I talk to anyone. I act like the bleeding is the main event but honestly it's the tiredness that floors me. Two days after a heavy one I feel like I've been run over. Wanted to ask, has anyone gone in specifically asking about iron levels? I keep reading that ferritin can tank and that it explains a lot of the exhaustion but I don't know if I'd be pushing my luck asking for a full blood panel or if that's a totally normal thing to request. I've written it down so I don't chicken out and forget to mention it. Also, total side note, I've been doing really simple dinners on the bad days because cooking anything complicated feels impossible. Lentil soup from a tin, beans on toast, that sort of thing. Not glamorous but it keeps me upright. Anyway. Hi. I've been reading this room for a while and it's the first time I've felt like other people actually get it x

41 and my periods have basically become a separate entity that I have to plan my entire life around. Last month I went through so much in two days I genuinely could not leave the house. The month before, barely anything. I have no idea what I'm working with from one cycle to the next and it is exhausting in a way that goes beyond the bleeding itself, like there's this low-level dread that just sits there all the time now. I've started writing things down because I want to actually go to my GP with something concrete rather than just sitting there saying "it's a lot" and getting sent away with leaflets. So I've been keeping a rough fatigue diary alongside the period stuff, just noting when I can barely get off the sofa versus when I feel more or less human. Curious whether my worst days track with the heaviest bleeding or whether the tiredness is doing its own thing. Anyone else been to the GP about this and managed to get bloodwork done? I want to ask specifically about iron and ferritin because I've read that ferritin in particular can be low even when standard iron looks fine, but I don't want to go in sounding like I've diagnosed myself off the internet. I just want to go in prepared. Any pointers on what actually got taken seriously would be really helpful x

Hi all, quick one because I am trying to catch the pattern before I forget it. The irregular periods bit is tangled up with carrying spare clothes and feeling twelve again for me this week. I am noting fatigue diary and saving a few details around bloodwork questions before my next GP conversation. Not looking for anyone to fix it, just wanted to put it somewhere women might understand x

Jun 21 · Liked post

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Vera, 61. Postmeno and still learning, apparently. Something I've clocked recently: the 3pm thing. Every single day I hit a wall and reach for biscuits or whatever's nearest. I used to think it was just tiredness or boredom but I've started wondering if it's actually to do with what I had for breakfast. Most mornings I have toast. Maybe half a slice if I'm not hungry. And then I wonder why I'm flagging by mid-afternoon?? I started having eggs with it a couple of weeks ago, or some Greek yoghurt if I can't face cooking. Nothing dramatic. And I think... maybe it's helping? The crashes feel less severe. I'm reluctant to say that too loudly in case I jinx it. I've also been doing a rough plan for three dinners a week rather than standing in the kitchen at half six wondering what on earth to make. That alone has taken something off my shoulders, honestly. I've got a GP review coming up and I want to ask about bloodwork, specifically whether there's anything that might explain the energy dips, the weight sitting differently than it ever has. I don't want to go in and just say "I'm tired" because I know what that gets you. Does anyone have suggestions for how to phrase it so they actually look into it properly? I always come out of appointments feeling like I didn't ask the right things. x

Jun 21 · Liked post

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The anxiety thing is the bit I can't explain to anyone. There's no trigger. Nothing bad has happened. Work is fine, kids are fine, nothing is on fire. And yet at about half six most evenings I get this low-level dread that just... sits there. Like waiting for news that never comes. My husband looks at me like I should be able to name the reason and I genuinely cannot. I'm 50 and I've started wondering if this is hormonal rather than me just falling apart psychologically. Someone on here mentioned it a while back, the anxiety that doesn't have a story attached to it, and that phrase has stayed with me. I've got a GP appointment coming up and I'm going to try to ask about HRT and whether it can help with sleep and this formless dread specifically. I always forget half of what I want to say the moment I sit down in that room so I've been writing things down this week. Not symptoms exactly, more like... the texture of how I feel. Hoping that's useful. Also started eating a proper breakfast with eggs or something substantial because I read it can help with the afternoon energy crash. Too early to know if it's doing anything but I've managed it four days running which for me is practically an achievement. Dinner has been whatever's fastest. Pasta, beans on toast, leftovers. I cannot be doing with cooking properly when I feel like this and I've stopped pretending I will. x

Jun 20 · Liked post

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50 years old and my periods have basically lost the plot. I went 47 days without one, thought right, that's it, it's happening, told my husband, felt weirdly emotional about it. And then. THEN. It came back like it had a point to prove. I genuinely had to change twice at work on a Tuesday morning and I work in an open plan office with mostly men in their thirties. The shame of it. I am not twelve. I've started keeping a little calendar on my phone, nothing fancy, just noting when it starts, how heavy, how many days. Feels a bit ridiculous at my age but the GP asked me last time how long my cycles were and I just sort of waved my hand and said "irregular" and she wrote something down and I have no idea what. I want to go back with actual numbers. Also wondering whether anyone has asked their GP specifically about iron levels? I am so tired all the time and I don't know if that's the blood loss or sleep or just life but I feel like I should be asking for something when I go in. Just don't want to turn up and blank again x

Jun 20 · Liked post

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39 and I've spent more time this month reading supplement labels than I have sleeping. Which is saying something given the sleeping situation. Every single account I follow has a different stack. One woman swears by ashwagandha, the next says it made her worse. Someone else is doing magnesium glycinate plus L-theanine plus lion's mane plus three other things I can't pronounce and honestly I don't know whether she feels better or she's just very good at content. I don't want content. I just want to know what an actual normal person with a job and a tight budget actually noticed. Not a transformation. Just... did it do anything or not. I've written out what I'm already taking (just vitamin D, been on it for years) and what I eat most days because I read somewhere that protein and fibre cover a lot of ground before you start spending money on capsules. I don't know if that's true but it at least felt like a sensible place to start without immediately spending £40 on something a stranger on Instagram told me to. I've got a GP appointment in six weeks and I want to bring a list of anything I'm considering so she can tell me if it clashes with anything. Is that a weird thing to do? Feels a bit anxious even typing it but I'd rather ask than just quietly take a handful of things and hope for the best x

Jun 20 · Liked post

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58 and I have become the woman who plans her whole day around whether her knees are going to cooperate. I don't talk about it much. My husband asks how I'm doing and I say fine. My daughter calls and I say fine. I come here and I say it: my joints are the loudest thing in my life right now and I have just been quietly managing around them for months. The walking plan is helping, genuinely. Thirty minutes most mornings, nothing heroic, just out the door before I can talk myself out of it. Some days it loosens everything up and I feel almost normal. Other days I'm limping back in thinking okay that was too much. I've been reading about calcium and vitamin D and I've been more intentional about food lately, more dairy, more sardines, which my husband thinks is hilarious. I'm not making any claims, it's just something I'm paying attention to. I've been on HRT for six years now and I have a checkup coming up and I want to actually ask the real questions this time. Not just "is this still okay" but like, what are we thinking about long term? What does staying on it look like at 60, 65? I keep chickening out of that conversation and I don't know why. Maybe because I'm scared of the answer. Maybe because I don't want anyone to take the one thing that's been keeping me functional. Anyone else navigating that appointment anxiety? The kind where you finally have the questions ready and then you walk in and somehow say nothing.

Jun 19 · Liked post

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Trying magnesium this month. Just that. Writing down whether my sleep changes. Not buying anything else until I know. x

Jun 18 · Liked post

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Hi all. 58, post-menopause, finally feeling cautiously better after a rough few years. Here to listen more than talk but glad to be here x

Jun 18 · Liked post

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41 and feeling like a complete fraud in here tbh. Every menopause space I find seems to be for women in their 50s and the period tracker apps keep asking me if I'm trying to conceive 🙄 like mate that is NOT the vibe right now. My cycles have been doing weird things for about eight months. Sometimes 24 days, sometimes 34. I used to be clockwork. And I'm exhausted in a way that sleep doesn't fix, which is fun. The anxiety has got worse too but I keep telling myself it's just work, just the kids, just life being A Lot. I've started writing things down because I couldn't remember what was happening from one month to the next. Not in any organised way, just notes on my phone. When I woke up at 3am, how much coffee I'd had, whether I'd actually eaten before noon. Turns out I almost never eat before noon which probably isn't helping anything. Going to try and actually have something before I leave the house in the mornings. Genuinely curious if it shifts the 11am crash. Also trying to figure out how to bring the cycle stuff up with my GP without her just nodding and saying stress. Any tips on how to make it sound like data rather than a complaint? x

Jun 18 · Liked post

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can I just say the supplement aisle in Boots is genuinely one of the most stressful places I've been recently and I work in a primary school so that's saying something 😂 everything has a claim on it. everything is "clinically shown" or "formulated for women over 40" or whatever. and then I open Instagram and it's ten different influencers telling me I need ten different things urgently or my bones will crumble and my brain will fall out I'm 39, I'm knackered, I can't afford to just chuck £30 at every bottle that looks convincing. I've been trying to keep a rough note of what I'm spending and honestly it adds up embarrassingly fast even when I've bought nothing what I actually want is just... someone saying "I tried this one thing, here's what happened, here's what didn't." not a brand deal. not a protocol. just a normal story from a normal woman I've been trying to sort protein and fibre out through actual food first before I go near any of it, because that at least costs roughly the same as what I'm already buying. eggs, lentils, that kind of thing. nothing dramatic if I do end up seeing my GP about any of this I want to go in with a proper list of whatever I've been taking so I'm not just going "erm, something from Holland and Barrett?" but right now the list is mostly wishful thinking and a half-eaten bag of mixed seeds anyway. solidarity to everyone else staring blankly at the same shelves x

Jun 16 · Liked post

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ok so this is going to be a long one, sorry in advance, i'm typing this at 11pm which is basically my new normal because sleep is apparently optional now?? I've been trying to track my cycles and symptoms properly for about two months because I have a GP appointment coming up and I want to go in with actual information rather than just saying 'I feel weird and tired and anxious and also my periods have gone strange' and watching her nod politely and do nothing. I need dates. I need patterns. I need evidence basically. So I downloaded about four different apps. Here is my extremely unglamorous review of all of them. The first one was clearly designed for people trying to get pregnant. Every single screen was about fertile windows and ovulation and I'm 40 and in the middle of wondering if I'm perimenopausal so that was a fun mismatch. Deleted it after three days. The second one was actually okay for logging periods but the symptom options were really limited? Like I could log 'cramps' and 'bloating' but there was no option for 'sat in the car park at Tesco for ten minutes because I couldn't remember why I'd driven there' or 'cried at a Boden email'. Brain fog wasn't even a category. Mood options were basically happy, sad, or anxious, which doesn't really capture the specific flavour of 'fine but also somehow not fine at all'. The third one wanted me to pay £9.99 a month before I could see my own data properly which, no. The fourth one I'm still using. It's not perfect. The interface is a bit clunky and I keep accidentally logging the wrong date. But it lets me add free text notes which is the bit I actually needed. So now I'm writing things like 'woke at 3am, mind racing, nothing specific' or 'period started, heavier than last month, really tired by 2pm'. Just observations really. Not sure what I'll do with it yet but at least I'll have something to show someone. What I actually want to know is whether anyone has found something better. Specifically something that doesn't assume you're either trying to conceive or already fully in menopause, because I'm in this weird middle bit where I don't quite fit either. My cycles have changed, I'm anxious in a way I wasn't two years ago, I'm tired in a way that sleep doesn't fix, and I'm 40 which apparently means I'm 'too young' for some of this conversation but also old enough that my body is clearly doing something. Also does anyone just use a notes app or a paper diary? I keep thinking maybe simpler is better and I'm overcomplicating this. Would love to know what's actually working for people in this room specifically, not just general period trackers designed for 25 year olds x

Jun 15 · Liked post

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61 and still here, still talking about sleep, because nobody warned me it just... carries on. My periods stopped eight years ago. Eight. And yet here I am at 3am last Tuesday staring at the ceiling, completely wired, for no reason I can name. I thought post-menopause meant I'd be out the other side of all this. Nobody said the other side might still have its moments. The thing that has actually shifted something for me is the strength training, which I started about two years ago and felt absolutely ridiculous doing at first. I'm not lifting heavy, just twice a week with a trainer who knows I'm not trying to become anyone, I just want to stay upright and independent into my seventies. Whether it's helping my sleep or just giving me something to feel good about I honestly couldn't say. Probably both. I've also been eating a lot more protein than I used to. Eggs most mornings, fish a couple of times a week. I read something about muscle loss after sixty and it properly frightened me so I started paying attention. It's not glamorous but neither is being wobbly. Got a review with my GP in the autumn and I want to actually ask about bones and heart this time, not just let it be a five-minute box-tick. I've been writing down questions so I don't go blank the second I sit down. That always happens. Anyway. If you're newer to all this and someone tells you it's over once your periods stop, just know it's a bit more of a long game than that. Still worth playing though. x

Jun 15 · Liked post

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50 and finally got an appointment after months of being told it's 'probably stress'. so I've been writing everything down this past fortnight. flushes during the day, flushes at night, the ones that wake me up at 2am soaked through. trying to get a proper count before I go in so I can actually say a number instead of just 'loads'. the thing I'm curious about though, completely without wanting to be steered either way, is the patch vs gel thing. I've read bits and pieces and honestly I just want to know what other women's day-to-day experience was like. like, did the patch stay on in the bath? did the gel feel weird in summer? I'm not asking anyone to tell me what to do, I just find the practical reality stuff really hard to find anywhere. also unrelated but I've been eating a lot of cold salads and chilled soups lately because standing over a hot hob in the evening is genuinely unbearable right now. my husband thinks I've gone off cooking. I haven't, I'm just trying not to combust before 7pm 😅 anyway. appointment is next Thursday. wish me luck.

Jun 15 · Liked post

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Anyone tried those cooling mattress pads? Hot flashes are winning lately and I'm desperate. US recs preferred, honest reviews only please 😩

Jun 15 · Liked post

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Can I ask something a bit specific. Do your energy crashes come with that slightly sick feeling or is it just me? Mine hit around 2 or sometimes 4 and it's not just tired, there's this weird hollow wobbly thing that goes with it and I've started wondering if it's blood sugar related. I mentioned it to my GP and she did do some bloods which came back fine, but fine doesn't mean I don't feel dreadful every afternoon, does it. What I've noticed, and I'm not saying this fixes it, but on the mornings I have eggs or something actually filling rather than cereal, the afternoon is noticeably less awful. Not gone. Just less. I've been trying to carry that into dinners too, more protein generally, partly because I read something here a few weeks back that stuck with me. Still not consistent enough to know if it's real or wishful thinking but I'm keeping an eye on it. Would be genuinely interested if anyone else has brought this to their GP and got anywhere useful with it.

Jun 15 · Liked post

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51 and genuinely cannot tell if this is burnout or perimenopause or just... being me now. The brain fog is the bit that scares me most. I used to be sharp. I was the person in the room who remembered everything, followed every thread in a meeting, came out with the exact word. Now I'm standing in front of my team going "the, um, the thing, the document with the... figures" and my junior colleague is filling it in for me with this very kind face that makes it worse somehow. I've started writing things down in a notebook obsessively. Not because I'm organised, because I'm terrified. Every word I blanked on, every moment I had to ask someone to repeat something simple. I'm building up a little log of it because I've got a GP appointment next month and I want to be able to say "here are actual examples" rather than just "I feel foggy" which sounds like nothing. This week I've been trying something with lunch. More protein, less of the sad desk sandwich I'd been eating. I don't know if it's doing anything yet but the 3pm crash has been slightly less catastrophic the last couple of days. Slightly. I'm not making any claims. Just noticing. Is it peri? Is it five years of stress? Both? I genuinely don't know and that uncertainty is its own kind of exhausting. x

Jun 15 · Liked post

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Said 'procurement' out loud without blanking. Tiny. But I noticed it. Logging it here. x

Jun 15 · Liked post

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I've been meaning to post this for a while because I found it genuinely useful and I know a few people here have mentioned dreading GP appointments and then coming out feeling like they didn't say half of what they meant to. I had an appointment last month and for the first time I actually went in with a written list. Not a long one. Just a note on my phone with the date things started and roughly how often they were happening. I'd been tracking for about ten days beforehand, just a quick note each morning about how I'd slept and whether the anxiety had been bad the night before. What I noticed when I wrote it all out was that the symptoms were more connected than I'd realised. The nights I woke at 3am were often the nights I'd had a glass of wine with dinner. The anxious mornings were almost always after a bad night. I hadn't seen that pattern until I looked at it all in one place. The things I ended up writing down for the appointment: - sleep (when I wake, how long I'm awake, whether I feel hot) - anxiety (morning, evening, or both, and whether there's a reason or not) - brain fog moments at work, specifically the word-finding thing which I'd been too embarrassed to mention - cycle changes, because mine have been all over the place - how long this has been going on, roughly I didn't go in demanding anything. I just said I'd been tracking and showed her the notes. It felt so different to my usual performance of 'I'm fine, just a bit tired'. She actually listened. We talked about whether this could be perimenopause and what the options were. I'm not saying it'll go like that for everyone, genuinely, every GP is different and I know some people have had a much harder time. But having the notes meant I didn't forget the brain fog bit, which I definitely would have done. Just sharing in case it's useful. The evening walks I've been trying have also helped a bit with the winding-down thing but that's a whole other post 😊 x

Jun 14 · Liked post

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First post! 43, LA, perimenopause I think. Periods went from manageable to absolutely unhinged in about six months. So glad this community exists.

Jun 14 · Liked post

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The 3pm thing is killing me. Every single day, somewhere between half two and four, I just... fall off a cliff. Can't concentrate, want to eat everything in the kitchen, feel vaguely awful. It's been going on for months and I kept blaming bad sleep or stress or just getting older but I'm starting to think it's actually got something to do with what I'm eating earlier in the day. I've been a toast-and-coffee person for about thirty years. Works fine, doesn't it. Except apparently now it doesn't. I had eggs on Monday because I had a bit more time and the crash didn't happen, or at least it wasn't as bad. Probably a coincidence but I've been paying attention since then. Also trying to plan three proper dinners a week rather than just winging it every night and ending up having cereal at 8pm because I couldn't decide. That's a work in progress. My GP appointment is coming up and I want to ask about bloodwork because my weight has shifted quite a bit over the last two years, not dramatically but steadily, and I'd like to understand whether that's just life or whether something's actually changed hormonally. Does anyone know what to ask for specifically? I never quite know how to have that conversation without sounding like I've been googling too much (I have been googling too much). x

Jun 14 · Liked post

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Hello wise ladies. Been lurking for a bit but this feels like the right place to ask. I'm 61, been post-menopausal for about eight years now, and I've been on HRT for most of that time. Generally I feel like it's been the right thing for me but that's just my own experience, not something I'd push on anyone else. The thing I keep not mentioning at my GP appointments is the joint pain. It's in my knees and my hands mostly, worse in the mornings, and I've just been sort of... accepting it as the price of getting older? But I was talking to a friend recently who'd had a DEXA scan and it made me think I should probably be having a more joined-up conversation about all of it. Bones, joints, the long-term HRT picture, whether I should be asking about a scan. Here's the thing though. Every time I go in I end up talking about something else. The joint stuff feels less urgent somehow, even though it's actually the thing affecting my day-to-day the most. I can't lift my granddaughter without my hands complaining and that bothers me more than I let on. I've started writing a little timeline of when the joint pain started and when it got worse because I genuinely couldn't remember when I'd last had a pain-free morning. It's been useful just having it written down, even if just for me. Has anyone managed to get a proper conversation going with their GP about joints alongside the long-term HRT stuff? Did you have to push for a bone scan or did it come up naturally? I feel like I need to go in with a proper list this time rather than letting the appointment drift. Any experiences gratefully received x

Jun 21 · Replied to Community post

Oh you are absolutely allowed to be here! I'm 41 and had the same "blood test is normal, off you go" experience. It's maddening. The writing things down is such a good call, I did the same and it genuinely changed how the next appointment went. I had dates, I had specifics, and it was much harder to be fobbed off. x

Jun 20 · Replied to Community post

Oh love, the chair. I felt that in my whole body. That happened to me at a parents evening last year and I had to do that awkward shuffle-out thing hoping nobody noticed. Mortifying doesn't cover it. Your tracking idea is genuinely brilliant and not daft at all. I did something similar before my GP appointment and it made such a difference, she actually looked at it properly. I'd say note the fatigue levels too, not just the bleeding, because that's what finally got me a ferritin blood test. Good luck with the appointment, you've got this x

Jun 20 · Replied to Community post

Oh love, the toilet cubicle moment. I felt that in my whole body. I had almost exactly the same thing happen at a parents' evening last year and I wanted to actually cry. You are absolutely not alone in this. The written records thing, yes, do it. I brought a little printed table to my GP and I genuinely think it changed the whole tone of the appointment. She could SEE it rather than just take my word for it. Still took a bit of pushing but it helped. Six weeks is a long wait when you're going through it though. Hope it comes round quickly x

Jun 20 · Replied to Community post

Oh love, the open plan office on a Tuesday. I felt that in my soul. I've had to do the very casual "just popping to the loo" walk approximately four times in a morning and I work with men who think a bad cold is a medical crisis. The calendar is such a good idea, I started doing the same thing a few months back and it genuinely changed my GP appointments. She actually looked at me differently when I came in with dates rather than just vibes. Definitely ask about iron, I was borderline anaemic and had no idea, just thought I was tired because, you know, life. Worth pushing for the blood test. You've got this x

Jun 20 · Replied to Community post

Honestly refreshing to see someone not buying the entire Holland and Barrett shelf at once 😂 I did exactly that last year and learned nothing. Hope it helps. x

Jun 20 · Replied to Community post

Oh this is exactly what I started doing a few months back and it genuinely changed everything at my GP appointment. I went in with actual dates, actual patterns, instead of just going red and saying "it's been a lot lately". She took me so much more seriously. Two weeks is enough to show something real, honestly. Good luck next month, hope she listens properly x

Jun 19 · Replied to Community post

Oh love, the cardigan round the waist. I feel that in my soul 😩 I'm 41 and mine have gone completely rogue in the last year so I really do get it. I'd say note down how tired you feel the day or two after the heavy days, not just the bleeding itself. I mentioned to my GP that I was basically useless for two days afterwards and that seemed to land differently than just "heavy periods". She actually ordered some bloodwork after that. Fingers crossed for your appointment x

Jun 18 · Replied to Community post

I'm only 41 and still in the heavy periods chaos stage so the other side feels very far away right now. But genuinely thank you for posting this. On a bad week it's hard to imagine not feeling like this forever. Bookmarking it for a rubbish Tuesday. x

Jun 18 · Replied to Community post

Ha, the white blazer founder is basically its own genre at this point isn't it. I've been lurking this room for a bit and this is exactly the kind of honest post I needed to see. I'm so tired of feeling like I'm failing because I haven't optimised my supplement stack. Eggs at breakfast, vitamin D from the GP, that sounds like a perfectly sensible place to be. x

Jun 17 · Replied to Community post

Snap! I could have written this a year ago almost word for word. 41 here, same chaos. The exhaustion is genuinely the worst bit because it's so easy to blame everything else, the kids, the job, not sleeping well. Took me ages to connect it to the periods. Glad you're here x

Jun 17 · Replied to Community post

Oh love, I could have written this word for word. I did the exact same thing before my last appointment, dates, symptoms, the lot, and still walked out feeling like I'd made it all up. The bone-tiredness is real. The random Tuesday anxiety is real. You are not imagining any of it. Still here with you. x

Jun 16 · Replied to Community post

Oh love, the chair incident. I felt that in my soul. I had a very similar moment at a parents' evening last year and just sat there smiling through it like everything was fine. It was not fine. Yes, absolutely ask for ferritin specifically. I did exactly this at my last GP appointment and brought my little notes in and honestly it helped so much to have something concrete to show her rather than just 'I'm a bit tired'. She took it seriously straight away. The pads-per-day counting is unglamorous but it works. You've got this. x

Jun 16 · Replied to Community post

Oh love, four minutes counts. Genuinely. I sat in mine last week eating a cereal bar and staring at nothing and it was the best part of my day 😂 You didn't answer either of them. That IS boundaries. Well done you. x

Jun 15 · Replied to Community post

Snap! The 'within range but barely functioning' thing is so frustrating, I've been there. I started writing down how many pads or tampons I was going through per day on the heavy days, and honestly seeing it written down made me feel less like I was being dramatic. I also noted the fatigue separately, like 'fell asleep on sofa at 7pm, couldn't concentrate at work'. Having it all concrete made it harder for my GP to just nod and move on. Fingers crossed for you x

Jun 15 · Replied to Community post

I could have written this word for word, honestly. The unpredictability is the worst bit isn't it, at least when it was heavy I could plan around it, now I just never know what I'm getting. I'm 41 and my GP looked genuinely surprised when I mentioned perimenopause, like I was being dramatic. The calendar is a brilliant idea though, I've been doing something similar and it really helped me feel less like I was imagining it all. Also the lentil soup solidarity is real, nothing fancy is the only way to survive it 😂 x

Jun 15 · Replied to Community post

Oh love, the cardigan round the waist. I felt that in my soul. I've done the exact same thing, at a work meeting of all places, absolutely mortifying. The notes on your phone are such a good idea, I started doing something similar before my last GP appointment and it genuinely helped. I wrote down the number of pads per day on the worst days and she actually took it seriously for once. Bone tired is exactly the right phrase for it. Sending solidarity x

Jun 15 · Replied to Community post

Snap! Mine changed really fast too and I kept thinking I'd done something wrong somehow, like I'd caused it. I hadn't obviously. Took me ages to even book a GP appointment because I kept assuming it would just sort itself out. It did not sort itself out 😂 welcome x

Jun 14 · Replied to Community post

I'm a bit further behind you in all this but I do the exact same thing, go in for one thing and leave having not mentioned the thing that's actually bothering me most. The timeline is such a good idea. Honestly think I need to start doing that too x

Jun 14 · Replied to Community post

Oh love, the fraud feeling after. That's the bit that lingers isn't it. You covered it, nobody probably noticed half as much as you think, but you carry it around all day anyway. I haven't had to chair anything thankfully but I've been losing words mid-sentence in normal conversation and it's unsettling. The GP thing is tricky. I went in once saying I was tired and foggy and basically got told to sleep more 🙄 Think I need to go back with actual examples like you're planning. x

Jun 14 · Replied to Community post

Oh love, the cardigan around the waist. I have BEEN there. Honestly the scale you've made (light / medium / soaking / disaster) is exactly what I wish I'd had written down before my last GP appointment because I went in and just said "quite heavy" and she basically nodded and moved on. Ask for ferritin specifically, that's what I pushed for and it turned out mine was on the floor. Just say you want ferritin checked alongside a full blood count. That's how I phrased it and she did it no questions. Good luck with the appointment, you've got this x